Friday, January 4, 2019

Moving along!

I've been busy the past few days. I had hoped to have Epiphany out on Epiphany. I am, unfortunately, not going to make that date.

I am still in the editing process with the book.

It's a long damn book. Nearly 400 Word document pages. I'm trying to tame it down. I seem to be adding more to it as I revise. I've added nearly a thousand new words in just the first one hundred pages alone. That's after deleting as many. One thousand on top of the thousand-ish deleted... SIGHS.

And the more I read this story and revise this story the more I like this story. Which means... you won't. I have always found that strange. The stories I write that I love, the reader rejects. The stories I hate, and just wrote it to write something, the readers love. So yes... those three books you love... I hate them. Okay, one of them is because of the issues with the original publisher. I don't hate the actual story. But it's the cursed book for a reason. Those other two... yeah... wish I'd never written those.

So... anyway. I like Epiphany. And I probably fucked up the telling of it. I don't know. Second guessing is my super power. It's very long... uh... don't stop reading after that thing happens in the first hundred pages. Just stick with it. You should probably uh... remember that same advice around page 350 something too... are you going to hate it? probably. at least wait until the end to hate the whole thing. Or... just don't read it.

Uh, so... also the bad news is going to be the pricing. I'm sorry, but this book is much longer than anything I've ever written. And the cost of editing is killing me. So... yeah, it's going to be high. $6.99. I know. I'm sorry. And no, it will not ever be available in KU. I am not sorry to report that.

I just thought I'd give you the heads up on that.

Anyway... I will have this done in the next ten days or so. Next time I write, it will be about the book itself, not just the process. And no, I do not consider this to be a romance. Just saying that for when the angry protests start coming in. It's not a romance.

Talk later.


Thursday, December 27, 2018

Three Cover reveals and a Blurb of sorts.

Before I get to the new covers let's talk about Epiphany... Again.

I had hoped to release Epiphany on Christmas Day. The first day of Christmas. I am still editing this monster book. I will probably still be editing this book this time next year. It's massive. I'm trying to whittle it down from 123,500 words. I fear I'm adding more.

This book is... ugh. Just UGH. I've said many times it's unlike anything I've ever written before. It's not a romance. Not exactly. It was supposed to be a romance. Things happened on the way to the romance that made this something else.

And... it's 95% world building. As Alaina said, I just created my own EU. I had to ask what an EU is... Expanded Universe. Slaps head. Yeah. I did that. It's not the first one. The Scrimmage Series could be... but... you know those two MM paranormals I wrote? The witch and the detective book, and the witch and the shifter book... they're part of the same universe. One day I'll write the book that links them... because they are linked. Not today.

So... Epiphany... I have no fucking clue how to describe this book. It's paranormal. It's uh... epic. It's the first in a series of four stories. It will be the longest of the four... I hope. No, I don't know when I'm going to write the second book. I have learned my lesson about making promises that I can't keep. Don't make promises and I won't be constantly asked when...

So a blurb for Epiphany... 

Uh, there's this guy named Austin. He's uh... the curator of a small museum in a small city in Georgia. There's this other guy. A mystery guy. One that fascinates Austin. Then there's this other guy... Austin's best friend. Who followed Austin from Savannah to open a franchise of his family's Irish Pub... then there's these interns... and there might be a leprechaun ghost in the pub... and, well, it's complicated.

No, it's not a complicated in the way Beyond Complicated is complicated. It's a love triangle... until it isn't... a love square.... I DON'T KNOW! What do you people want from me!

It's not a romance romance, with very little sex and too much sex at the same time... and it's long and complicated and there's weird shit... and sighs. 

Hopefully, if I wrote it right, it's dark. Hopefully, if I did it right... it will make you angry... okay, no, that is a guarantee.  I wrote three different stories in this one damned book... and it drove me around a twist... and... fuck... It's a paranormal ghost thriller with a romantic subplot. If you go into this thinking the MC is destined for a HEA you might be upset. There will be a word flung around by the crowd that doesn't like... EUs.

So anyway... I'll figure out a blurb as soon as I get closer to a final edit, and get back to you then.

I can't say when I'm going to be finished editing this book. It won't be this year. That is fact. I'm still hoping for a January release. Cover is by Jay Aheer.

And that leads to the other part of the title... Three Cover Reveals.

I have another paranormal fantasy epic sex book completely finished. It's not gay. It's... gasp...
straight. GASP. I wrote it ten years ago and sent it to every publisher I could get to at the time. It was rejected by most of them... but then everything I wrote was rejected by most publishers. Most of them didn't know how to classify the story so... yeah... I've pushed the boundaries of romance for two decades. Not going to apologize for it. I write romance. I write fiction with a romantic element. I
disappoint readers of both...

Anyway... Cloak and Athame is another witch... because I like witches and ghosts... story. This one erotic suspense. If I did it right. I plan to publish C&A in February. Cover by Emmy Ellis. 

And book two is a short story I started a few years ago that ultimately became Sidelined. Don't ask me how it became Sidelined. I just remember that I stopped writing this one to write Sidelined which has a similar base plot... but this one has always pulled me back to it. I decided to finish it. And I am almost finished with it. It's a football book. Not one of THOSE football books. It's not part of THAT universe. It's football... like Beyond Complicated is football... wait? What? Okay BC is not football... but... anyway... two older guys and one young college quarterback getting his kink on... so there. It's simply an erotic football/cop menage story... that will have a character from another short story cameo...

The cover is from a photo I purchased from Dan Skinner a while back, that my son graciously put my name and the title on. No it's not slick. It's basic. And that's the way I want it. 

If I can get Epiphany finished and out early next month, then The QB Connection will come in late January. Maybe on my birthday.

And finally, the third book in the Adventures, INK series that no one wanted but I wanted to write. In which the two friends who got caught in the act with the bride in the first book... deal with the fallout of their actions... and figure out some stuff while running from the scandal they created. Cover is also by Jay Aheer. 

Gone Astray isn't finished yet. I'm about 75% finished with it. Then the editing. It's set in March and early April, just like the first two books. It runs concurrent with Match Day, and Long Way and meets up at the end of Long Way... to... hell if I know... finish out this story.

I plan to release Gone Astray in late March. Earlier if I can, but definitely late March... then it's off to something new.

I won't say I'll end the year with that book you've all been waiting for... no promises I can't keep. But we'll see what this year brings.

Or doesn't bring.

Anyway... please don't post these covers to Good Reads until closer to an actual release date.

Talk more in 2019


Wednesday, December 26, 2018

Happy Day after Christmas ramblings

You know, it was colder on Thanksgiving day than it was on Christmas day.
Thought I'd get the weather out of the way first.
I always talk about the weather.
Weather rules my life. 
It's rained a lot this fall. I'd say winter, but winter is barely a week old and it hasn't rained that much since Yule. But this fall, pretty much since the hurricane in October it's just been dismal. Way more dark rainy days than normal. And yeah, that thing about it being dark and dreary when you have chronic depression... it sucks. Like the life is drained out of you. This never seeing the sun thing.

I talk a lot about the past two years being bad. And I'm going to one last time.
I think this time of year really hurts when you have no family left.
I mean... the family I created for myself is still here. Nothing has happened to my kids. And my siblings are still alive. But they're no longer part of my life. Losing a parent sucks. I mean... seriously. Even in middle age and you know it's going to happen eventually. It just fucking sucks. To lose a parent that was abusive and made your life a living hell... and have no way to actually grieve that loss without rage and bitter hatred being the overriding factors in that grief... then layer in the bullshit of dealing with her estate while your siblings make that a living hell because of greed... my hair is completely gray now.

My mother's house was a complete loss two years ago. And she was living in it. She'd piled about ten years worth of household garbage in every room up to the ceiling. Leaving paths to walk through to the rooms she did use. She'd always been a hoarder. Always. In her final years she hoarded her own garbage until she could no longer find a stove to cook on. And she lived like this. Holes in the roof. A broken pipe in the kitchen. 

The day I got the keys to the house we walked through puddles of black mud... in the house I grew up in. 

And... for two years I've had nightmares about my life in that house, with that woman, then... and now. And people are like... why can't you get over it? It's been two years. Time to just let it go.

I can't. I tried. I tried so hard. So So hard. Her death... sucked the life right out of me. 

It's like I will never have closure. As long as she was alive there was always a chance... that's how many survivors of abusive parents feel. As long as that evil person is alive one day I might be able to just ... fill in the blank... one day you might love me. one day I might be strong enough to tell you how badly you wounded me... how you destroyed my soul and didn't give a shit... one day there could be that final come to Jesus meeting and you could have some peace knowing it was over... death is permanent. It's over. I'll never get another phone call just to listen to her tell me how fat and useless I am. And how much she hates my children. I will never have to deal with her hate and anger and her paranoia again. It's been two years and I still won't answer a phone call from the 850 area code. Because in my head it's going to be her and I'm going to have to change one more phone number. I like this phone number. I don't want to change it.

Ah, yes, the people who say there are therapists who can help with that... yeah... no. So I internalize it all and it made me angry and bitter and I shut down. I know this. I was on my way to becoming... her.

God, I hate holidays. I hate them because we never had them. Not really. I hate my birthday because I after my twelfth, that was it. I never had another card. Or present. Or even a Happy Birthday from my family. It was done. Holidays... hurt.

Money was terrible this year. Made worse by events on Christmas Eve... The house is in foreclosure. There's not enough money to pay most of the bills... and the whole, this is my fault because my books no longer sell... just compounds all the anger and rage and guilt.... so much guilt.

I wasn't able to buy my kids presents this year. Not really. I have three adult children, and they get it. I think. The twelve year old tho... 

There were no presents under the tree this year. Not a single one. 

For the first time in 29 years I didn't spend my anniversary wrapping presents for everyone but me. 29 years of trying to make up for not ever having Christmas in my life before. Trying to make sure I got cards out to everyone. Friends. Two families. Trying to make sure my siblings got something. Then my own children. Even if it wasn't much, it was wrapped and under the tree. 29 years of me being the only person who did that for anyone. 29 years of being the only person without anything under the damn tree from anyone. 

I can't do it anymore. And on the one hand I feel guilty as fuck about it. I hate Christmas with a searing burning horrible rage filled hate so strong I can't even begin to describe it. Thanksgiving is worse. Thanksgiving is me waiting hand and foot on my father and my siblings while they sat in my living room and watched my TV without ever once offering to help me or even talk to me, then criticize what I chose to cook for a holiday I didn't want to have in the first place... then leave to go back to their own homes in another state... without even a kiss my ass... they drove all that way because I'm the only one who can cook a damned turkey... then just left...

I took Aubrey out last week and let her pick out a few things. She got a movie, two books, and a squishy thing that looks like it might come to life at night and murder people in their sleep. This was her Christmas. It didn't come with ribbons and bows. I didn't wrap anything. I didn't send cards to anyone. We got one card this year. Just one. Years of sending cards to people who can't even bother to send one in return... 

I quit Christmas.

Alaina and Aubrey made all of the treats. I gave them the tools, the supplies, and the recipe. Told them if they wanted it, there it was. While the husband and I went out to lunch for our 30th anniversary, they made the Christmas fudge, and crack, and pumpkin pie... Alaina made a pound cake.

My son and his fiancee came for lunch yesterday. We haven't seen them since Thanksgiving. They work in sales... so it's a thing. The crazy time of year. Been there. Done that. Don't ever want to do it again.

There was no turkey or ham or anything traditional.

We made breakfast. A big breakfast with grits, and biscuits, and ham and sausage and bacon and eggs... and Christmas music. A Very Special Christmas from 1987. 

And it was good.

We just were.

The husband and I cooked. The kids helped get the table set. They did the clean up. There was laughter. The youngest wasn't happy that there were no gifts under the tree... but that's not what Christmas is about.

Christmas is about being together. And we did that. And I got to enjoy it for the first time... ever. 

The son and his fiancee left taking food with them.

We watched the movie Aubrey picked out. The House with a Clock in it's Walls. Then she went to spend time on the computer... and the only Christmas movie I watched this season was watched. It's not Christmas until Mel Gibson and Danny Glover blow shit up.And finally Guardians of the Galaxy... because, for me, twisted broken characters and Christmas go hand in hand.

Anyway, hoping you had a stress free holiday, and next time I'll get you updated on when to expect a new book from me.



Tuesday, December 18, 2018

Epiphany is Finished. Sort of.

I started the story that would become Epiphany on October 27, 2017. I wrote it as my NaNo book for last year. I started with an idea and a few paragraphs on November 1st and on November 31st I had written fifty-three thousand words. I won NaNo for the second time since 2010. But the book was far from finished. 

I struggled with this story for months before setting it aside. What was supposed to be a simple ghost story romance became something... well it wasn't simple... and it isn't a romance. Not really.

A secondary character emerged as a love interest. I thought this would be a simple love triangle story... nope. Wrong again. That character has more going on than meets the eye... then new secondary characters emerged. And the story got more complicated... and darker.

So I set it aside because I had no idea where it was going and fifty-three thousand words dragged on to seventy-five thousand words with no end in sight. I set it aside in the spring because I'd lost the plot. Or never had the plot. I had a beautiful cover made that represents the romance. Such a gorgeous cover.

It's a Christmas story... not really. I wanted to release it last year for Christmas.

In mid-November I thought I could top this thing off at around ninety-five thousand words and be done with it. Get it out on the first day of Christmas... that's Christmas day.

I was wrong. 

I finished Epiphany Sunday night... well Monday morning. December 17, at 1:45 central time. I wrote more than twenty thousand words in three days. I still can't feel the fingers on my left hand. My brain is still mush.

But I goddamn fucking finished that fucking book. It's one hundred twenty-three thousand five hundred thirty-two words.

It is not a romance. Not really. It's a beginning.

It is the beginning of a four book series. A Winter Story. A Spring Story. A Summer Story. And an Autumn Story. Epiphany, Slainte, Liberty, and Hallowed... If this story does well enough and I'm not crucified for how it ends.

It's dark. I hope it's suspenseful. If you're easily triggered... you might be triggered. If you are looking for a meet cute, sexy time, HEA... you won't find that here.

It is MM. All four books will be MM(with one exception-ish). Epiphany starts at the ending and ends at the beginning... all of the players are on the stage by the last chapter.

It's unlike anything I've ever written. And I'm terrified of it. When I've never been afraid to push any envelope or cross any line before. This one scares the hell out of me.

So... it is finished. And I'm going to start the editing process tonight. I hope to have it finished this month. But... well... Epiphany is still three weeks away. Maybe by then. 
I hope.

I'll tell you more soon. 


Saturday, December 8, 2018

I Binged All the Shows Today

It started raining last night around midnight. Which in itself is not out of the ordinary. Mobile is, upon occasion, the rainiest city in the lower 48 states. Which means we get a shit ton of rainfall every year. 
But, when it rains in Mobile, it tends to be more often than not, a deluge. We have storms roll in daily during the summer. Thunder, lightning, heavy downpour, sometimes hail. The whole kit and caboodle of weather. Some days it rolls right on through and it's bright and sunny and steamy for the rest of the day. Other days we sit under a heavy overcast sky with intermittent deluges. 

Last night it started raining. Just raining. Like someone turned on a shower with weak water pressure and left it running for hours and hours and hours and HOURS. That constant mind numbing sound of medium/light rain which we so seldom ever get... drove me bat shit crazy.

And it was cold. So, constant pitter-patter of rain and cold and... I turned on the TV and pulled on cozy clothes and binge watched hours of supernatural television today. Supernatural- Midnight, Texas- Wynonna Earp. And then watched ghost hunting videos on Youtube with Aubrey before cooking dinner.

It was a day. We were going to watch Dumplin' on Netflix together, but Alaina hijacked her into an afternoon of Doctor Who.

We finished the new She-Ra yesterday. And started the old Charmed. I'm thinking she's not interested, even tho she says she is. Aubrey, not Alaina, Alaina is definitely not interested in Charmed. We've finished The Dragon Prince, and Next Gen and Hilda and... I need grown up shows... someone please save me.

I am seriously not happy with Joe in Texas... he knows who he is... and he knows what he did... oh poor Chuy. Don't make me come out there... but oh honey, that was kinda hot. I hate myself for even thinking that.

Okay... so the dog has napped on me for hours and the kid went to bed, so time to finish Epiphany.

I'm hoping to get it done this weekend. I don't write during the day. Just at night. Four hours after she goes to bed.

I sort of became to Aubrey what my husband was to the older three kids. Just a person who lived in the same house as her. So... I've made the time every day to spend with her after school and on weekends. Even if it's just watching TV while one of us complains loudly about being forced to sit through something. I fear this next year might not be great for her. She's happy in this school and has friends in this neighborhood... and that's all about to end. Doing my best to get new material out so that we might have a chance to ward off foreclosure and bankruptcy. She knows Christmas will be just a day with decorations and food this year. But she wants for nothing. So... she says she understands.

Anyway... Epiphany... and what it's about... and why I say I've never written anything like this before in my writing life... and what inspired the story... coming next weekend.

I had planned to do a cover reveal for the next book in the Adventures, INK series soon. I'm going to hold that until after Epiphany is released. I'm still several chapters from finishing that one as well.

But right now... today was a good day. Off to destroy some lives. Talk later.


Friday, November 30, 2018

Book Release Date News

I plan to publish Epiphany, my NaNo 2017 book that I've struggled to finish, on the 1st Day of Christmas. If everything goes to plan. I should have it finished and in second draft form by Tuesday night.

I will have a cover reveal for Gone Astray and Cloak and Athame in the next couple of weeks. I plan to release those two books in January and February.

I have two short stories, one is unfortunately a Christmas story, that I'm working on. I had hoped to publish The QB Connection in November but things have not gone as planned. I'm going to finish the Christmas story quickly with hopes of getting it out before Christmas... but most likely it will be next Christmas. 

I really should start writing books for seasonal release LONG before the season. I am in awe of and jealous of people who can write a story with a quick turn around... anyway....

On the First Day of Christmas Mercy gives to you!

Cover art by Jay Aheer at Simply Defined Art