Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Unwanted Birthday Present and a Revelation

I got the flu for my birthday.

Friday night I started feeling strange. Hit me out of nowhere. Or was it Thursday night? One of those two. I'm not even sure what today is so, anyway, one or two nights before my birthday I got the flu.

I got this stomach thing that still hasn't let me go. I got the dizzies every time I stood up. Everything smells terrible. Like when I'm pregnant terrible. No I'm not pregnant. That is not possible in triplicate. I could have tumors and flesh eating diseases out the wazoo and not know it, but I know for a fact that I am not experiencing morning sickness, unless, you know, god is real and shit...

Anyway, I've slept most of the past few days. Or sat and watched television while wrapped in a blanket because I'm freezing and too tired to move.

I lost five pounds according to the scale this morning. Not in a oh yay yippie I lost five pounds kind of way. I lost five pounds in an I can't stand the smell of food and everything I get a whiff of sends me running and clenching to the bathroom. I don't vomit. I haven't eaten much. I managed my birthday dinner and cake. My son bought me a cake. It was a good day.

No one else in my family has this. Before or after me. I have no idea where it came from. I was fine. I went grocery shopping... on Thursday. I was fine for hours after... then not fine. It's like did they hand it to me out the drive-thru window? Did it hit that fast? Really. Can it go away?

I'm at the point in the process that my stomach is screaming that it's hungry but one bite of food sends me running. Please... just stop. And the headache and body aches and the tiredness. yeah

So anyway, I started watching the Pro Bowl on Sunday. Meh, it's like... boring as shit. But I've never actually watched the Pro Bowl. I'm just killing time to get me through to this coming Sunday and the main event... so, the husband person went to take a shower during halftime and I couldn't handle any more football talk so I started flipping stations.

We have a limited premium channel package. It comes with the upper level 'basic cable' package. The one that gives us Disney channel and the music channels. I don't get HBO or Epix or Cinemax. But I do get Stars and Showtime.

I think it was on Stars.

Grease 2.

I didn't catch it from the beginning. I never do. But I caught it early enough... well, hell, it doesn't matter where I catch it, I'm going to sit and watch the hell out of Grease 2.

The thing is, I hated Grease. HATED IT! I still hate Grease. I hated the way they shamed the good girl and forced her to change and in the end she changed everything about herself to get a guy. I hated that message when I was twelve watching it on network television for the first time. I hated it the first time I saw it uncensored on VHS a couple years later. I hated it the last time I watched it. I hated that they shamed the guy for being weak and falling for that type of girl. He did try to change himself for her but she made the change for him so he threw that off real fast. And I hated him for it. No one would accept them unless they were just like the crowd. I didn't like the message.

So why in the hell do I love the sequel? Everyone hates the sequel. EVERYONE! It tries to hard to be just like the original, but fails miserably, and hilariously. It's more like satire of the original than a sequel and it was just... horrible.

No, it was exactly like the original, but it wasn't cool enough to be the original so something must be wrong with it. It had the same theme. It had the same rampant misogyny. It had the same peer pressure. I had less sex in it. That's all. It was slightly cleaner. Only slightly. It was about a group of California greasers and their 'old ladies' played by thirty year olds trying to pass for seventeen or eighteen.

Instead of the bad boy, this time we have a bad girl, not happy with being some greaser's side piece. She's more than a bad girl, she's a tough bad girl. She likes motorcycles and could probably kick the shit out of all of those greasers if given the right motivation. She's torn between the small town world she knows and something bigger.

And the guy, he's the fish out of water nice guy. With the pretty face. The one who isn't liked or respected because he's too white bred. Too pretty, too pure. And too smart. But he isn't shamed for it like his cousin. he isn't forced to give up his brains to be accepted... he does it because he wants the girl. He makes the change of his own free will. He doesn't choose to fall to the crass level of the greasers, instead he makes himself better than them. He transforms himself into this guy that all nerd guys (and girls) dream of. The super cool dude who not only wins the hand of the fair damsel, but the adoration of the guys who never let him play in their game.... yeah, it's kind of lame, but so was the first one. Sandy had to win the 'respect' of the tough girls by becoming a slut. Stephanie wanted to rise above that. Danny just wanted to get tail. Micheal wanted to be a hero.

So a couple months ago this movie was on one of the channels I don't get when we had a FREEVIEW weekend. I hadn't watched it in years. A lot of years. I saw it on network television when the older kids were pre-teens. They watched it with me. Grudgingly. That was at least teen years ago. I was probably fifteen the first time I saw it, maybe a little younger. I can't remember. I had the soundtrack. On vinyl. I had that soundtrack memorized by the time I saw it. I have both soundtracks memorized....

So... okay, a couple months ago I'm watching this, it was around Thanksgiving. Probably that weekend. And it's so damned campy, but I still love it. And then it happened. Adrian Zmed took off his leather jacket and strutted around prowlin'... and my 48 year old self mentally scolded my 15 year old self for not appreciating the arms on that man. My fifteen year old self was too busy drooling over the pretty faced lead character to notice things like arms and big soulful eyes and longing glances and, did you see his ass in those jeans?

My fifteen year old self scolded me for objectifying the man... My 48 year old self said the dude's probably knocking 60 if he's still alive and wouldn't mind a little objectifying. fifteen year old me went ewww.

So, okay, I just watched this movie two months ago, and here I am watching it again, it's past the Cool Rider song, and well into the Micheal is learning to ride the bike but hasn't come out to play as the cool rider yet... and Stephanie and Johnny are still fighting like a married couple needing therapy to save their marriage. He just won't take a hint. Even though he's busy with Liza's little sister who was way too old to pass for a teenager... and, yeah, well Stockard Channing was probably the best character out of both movies and those Pink Ladies were bad... just bad... to say the least. But this time I'm watching this and I start noticing that this story isn't about the Pink Ladies and the T-birds. And fitting in. It's a love triangle.

I mean I knew that before. Johnny and Stephanie were a couple. She didn't want to be with him. He won't let her go. But honestly, I don't think he even likes her. He isn't smart. He isn't cool. He isn't  brave. He isn't anything like his predecessor... and he's jealous of the Cool Rider.


The scene at the bowling alley when the Cool Rider makes his debut and he takes on the rival gang... alone, Stephanie is mesmerized... but so is Johnny. They're both watching him from the doorway, both with almost identical looks on their faces. Johnny isn't jealous, he's mesmerized.

And the movie changes from there. It's not about Micheal and Stephanie. I'm not sure it ever was. It's about Johnny. It's about the guy losing his girl and the smart guy who comes in and then this guy who is everything that he isn't... the smart guy spending all the time being what Johnny isn't and the Cool Rider being everything else that Johnny isn't and Stephanie doesn't matter anymore. And Micheal doesn't matter anymore, not really. It's about Johnny of the hot arms and fine ass and this guy who makes him jealous and the soulful
brooding hurt filled eyes... and the panic as he thinks the guy died... and in the end when he finds out it was Micheal under the goggles and he can't stop staring with those brooding soulful hurt eyes because both of the men he was jealous of are one and the same and... he changed for Johnny... not Stephanie. Stephanie didn't want the leather jacket. She didn't want to belong to the T-birds... Micheal did. And for a moment when Johnny puts his jacket on Micheal and accepts him as a T-bird... that's what that movie is about.

And now I know why I write MM romance.

Or I was hallucinating from the flu... either way, you'll never watch that movie the same ever again.

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