Wednesday, February 14, 2018

So, the Patreon Thing


I start a lot of thoughts with so. I know. I tried to stop. I really did. I tried to stop cussing too. Especially in public. I don't drink or smoke or have any major horrible vices. Therefore, I say so a lot and I cuss. In public. Does that make me a bad person?

I really don't care, fuck off... anyway... I say anyway a lot too, because I ramble. Okay. So. Anyway.


I've been talking about this Patreon thing for a while now and it just never seems to happen. Because it's not something as simple as it pretends to be. It's like oh, hey, just jump on this thing over here and ask people for money to support your art. And they will give it. Will they? WILL THEY! No, because that's not how stuff works. It's not how I want it to work. If I'm going to ask for money, then I want to give something that is worth the money in return. Sort of like the reason I write books. I create a product. Someone else buys my product. Lots of someones buy my product. Capitalism is grand. I can create fictional people and real people pay me to read about my fictional people.


So Patreon operates on a Creator, Patron, platform. I create, you patronize me. Probably literally, but whatever y'all. Quid Pro Quo. I give you a little sumpin sumpin, you give me dollars.

So, there's that word again. So anyway, I've looked around and racked my brain trying to figure out something creative for a reward system... and shit y'all. It's not even that easy. It's setting up an entire new site and figuring out how to protect my creations and learning how to technology when I am still operating on missing my fucking flip phone. I mean personal computers have been around most of my life. I've had one for twenty-nine years now. You'd think I could learn how to tech some shit. But nooo.... anyway... I've been teching. Don't know if it's going to work correctly but I'm about there on the techy part. Or the how to give you stories on the Patreon and you get the stories on the Patreon and hopefully you can open the stories from the Patreon and my stories from the Patreaon don't end up on the pirate-on sites.

Also, then there's the creativity shit that I want to give you as a reward for giving me your dollars. And not be actual shit. You know. I try not to give anyone actual shit. I spend a lot of money to have everything edited. Doesn't always work out right... but anyway... the creative shit. I have partial stories and stories I can never publish because they will be banned because I like to write raunchy stuff that Amazon doesn't like and it's all just sitting around in files, wasted.

But... just random smut isn't probably the best thing to start off with. So what? What do I do for the Patreon thing that people might want to pay me a buck or two... every month. Oh, god, I have to sustain this thing don't I? I am not that creative... but... I have tons of partial stories and half thought of ideas for little things that shouldn't be published-published, but could be really good short... dare I say it?

Dare! Dare!


GASP! Mercy said WHA?

I don't like serials. I mean seriously. I don't like them. Why just yesterday I bought a short story companion to a series that I love. I paid 99 cents for it. I knew going in that it was just a time killer between novels... took me ten minutes to read. 75% of it was the first chapter of the first book in the series. That I already own. I mean if someone is buying the little shortie story they are familiar with the series right? Pissed me off. Yes, I knew it was going to be short. I didn't think it would take me ten minutes to read it. And I don't read as fast as I used to. Jesus. I swore I'd never do that.

But... I have written so much extra stuff for the Scrimmage series that will not ever be part of a published book that I could go literally months. And write more. Because I'm not expanding the plot. I'm writing sex ficlets between scenes. Or from other POVs. Or that whole story written from Levi's pedo cop's POV. Because the best way to understand the villain in one story is to make him the hero of his own story. And seriously, that guy is going to come back. And what the fuck happened in that limo after Levi's retirement/engagement/Super Bowl viewing party after they dropped Jude and Will off?

Wouldn't you like to know? Because I dearly wanted to know, but I wasn't in any of the four's POV and it would have been very, very gross to have Jude sitting in on an orgy... starring his brother.

Did you say orgy?

In a limo?

With Levi? And Tracy? And Bo? And Dylan?

Yes! I believe I did. When we left our intrepid duos, one of them was all out of sorts from lack of sex, and two of them were fighting, and trying to tempt another into becoming their third, and well, what the hell was the fourth one doing? And wouldn't you just like to be a fly on the wall of that heated ride... when it gets stuck in traffic in the dead center of New Orleans... when Livy is on the loose?

But we're talking orgy, like... you know, they only touch their own lover right?

Orgy! Period.

Oh... cheating!

Sighs. I give up.

But, if you know going in, that this is going to be written over the course of a few weeks at a time, probably one installment a month, and you know it's going to be around five thousand words each installment. AND you know it's not canon, because it's an 'outtake', ANDDDDD if it's consensual and all members are participating it's not cheating and good god, people, Dylan was DEAD! and then he was the walking dead and it was never cheating NEVER CHEATING. Eight years is too long to be celibate. Unless you choose to be... why are we discussing this?

So, okay, there, that's what I'm starting with. Hopefully this weekend. Part One of Stuck in Traffic: A Southern Scrimmage 'Outtake' Story. Of a possible three part story. Then a follow-up, post Offside Chance story before surgery... On the Edge: A Southern Scrimmage ficlet. And after that I could come up with more. So, this will be the two dollar level.

And the three dollar level will be something long. This month it will be Six Ways from Any Given Sunday... yes, you've read it. I hope. Six Ways from Sunday and it's companion novel, Any Given Sunday that tells the rest of that story... combined into one chronologically correct novel, the way it should have been written in the first place.

I have no idea what to do for a follow up since I don't have anything finished enough to offer. But I'll figure that out.

And the one dollar level will be a choice of four partially written stories that I abandoned... I'm going to give subscribers four first chapters and let them vote on which one to finish, as a monthly or bi-monthly installment series.

So, that's my ideas. To start. I believe the way it works is that you can subscribe to the one, or the two, or the three dollar levels, and the higher you subscribe the more you get, so if you subscribe to the two dollar level you'll get the one dollar level, and if you subscribe to the three dollar level, you get the one and two dollar levels. And if you subscribe to the one dollar level, you get the one dollar level, and any free stuff that I might add.

And why not higher than three bucks?

Because I just spent 99 cents on a five thousand word ficlet masquerading as something more and I'm still pissed about it. If I do more expensive levels they will have more expensive rewards attached. Like if I do an ARC level, for an upcoming novel, it will be around what the book will sell for. If I were to do say, a print book level or an audio book level, those would be more.

I'm hoping this excites you. Getting a glimpse into things that might not ever make it into a book. Outtakes and teasers and stuff. Because... I have no clue what to do otherwise.

So... okay... anyway. As soon as I get the tech stuff situated, I will launch this thing. You'll have to register with Patreon as a Patron. And you'll have to register with Bookfunnel to get your stories. Bookfunnel doesn't keep your info and doesn't use it. And Patreon is who you pay, then they pay me at the end of the month. You'll need a credit card. Not sure if they take paypal, and it's a subscription, but you can cancel at any time.... so... okay... anyway... How's that sound?



  1. It sounds good to me. I am so looking forward to these stories. For me You could probably just write Levi letting Liv out in front of a mirror. I really want this to work for you. Going off to sign up for book funnel.

  2. Sounds excellent to me - I’d definitely come in at the three dollar level - and be grateful it’s so inexpensive.

  3. Sounds fab. I'll be on the look out for when you launch. J already follow a few people on Patreon, so signing up isn't an issue. Can't wait for the limo story!

  4. That sounds fantastic! I don't think I could ever get enough of these characters.

  5. Sounds good to me. Can't wait to read all the good stuff. Once you launch, I'll sign up with bookfunnel and Patroon.

  6. Can't wait. I already follow others on Patreon so not a big deal. I want this to work for you. Will definitely do $3 level. Carlene

  7. Sounds great!!! I already know I want the $3 level and can't wait to read the limo scenes. I've never done Patreon but have been considering it since you've started mentioning it on fb. I'm really excited about the stories since I love your work and I hope this works out well for you.

  8. I'm in at $3 bucks and I'm a Santino Hassell Patron, so I can tell you that they do take PayPal, it's how I pay.